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  • Lena and Ole Joke Books

    If you need some more jokes about Lena and Ole (notice Lena always likes to list herself first), we've got lots of the  Red Stangland Ole and Lena Joke books (#1 – #8).  Now Ole says those are a bargain — still only $2.50 each plus shipping  — $1.00 each.  "Cheap, says Ole”, call 414-745-4362 or e-mail us.

    Breaking news: yes, there are now 8. When the Stangland sons (authors of the $2.50 Lena and Ole joke books) were cleaning their North Dakota warehouse, they found a #8!! It had evidently been forgotten and we now have it in stock while it lasts. Just as funny as the others!!

    Oleand Lena Jokes #8

    Oleand Lena Jokes #8

    Comments (0) 2:49 am |

    Joke of the Week: The Swede & the Norwegians

    A Swede enters the Wildwood Bar in Woodville where he stopped for the night.  He grabs a barstool and orders a drink.  After sitting there for a while, he yells to the bartender, "Hey, you wanna hear a Norwegian joke? 

    The Bar immediately falls absolutely quiet.  In a very deep, husky voice, the woman him says, "before you tell that koke, sir, I think it is only fair — given that you are new here — you should know five things:

    1.  The bartender is a Norwegian.

    2.  The bouncer is a Norwegian.

    3.  I'm Norwegian and a professional weightlifter.

    4.  The woman sitting next to me is Norwegian with a black belt in karate.

    5.  The man to your right is a Norwegian and a prorfessional wrestler.

    Now think about it seriously, Mister.  Do you still wanna tell that joke?  The Swede thinks about it for a second, shakes his head, and declares:  "Nah, not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times."

    Comments (0) 7:53 am |

    “Ole and Lena — A Stud and a Hot Dish”

    — "well, she says, ders dis new book dat is pretty good"  — it's called Ole & Lena — A Stud and a Hot Dish" — — probably da best gift for dat hard-to-buy for Scandinavian guy!!"  Just got in a new supply — only $6.95 plus shipping.  Call 414-745-4362 to order a big supply for Christmas (never too early to start shopping!!).

    So here goes… sample joke:  "Ole and Sven were driving in a camper that was 13 feet high when they stopped at an underpass (Lena's always warning Ole about those underpasses on the way to Arizona every January).  Well Ole and Sven saw a sign that read, "low bridge.  No vehicles over 12 feet".  "Vat do you tink, Sven?" asked Ole.  "Vell, dere's no cops around, " Sven answered.  " I say ve hit da gas pedal and go for it". 

    Now they have a great new book “Lena is from Minot and Ole is from Uranus — a hilarious flip-flop book!

    Comments (0) 7:44 am |

    Lena and Ole Joke of the Week

    Lena and Ole and Little Ole were invited to the Swenson's for Christmas.  Stuffed roast turkey was on the menu.  After dinner, Lena asked Little Ole how he liked the dinner.  Little Ole replied:  vell, da turkey was purty good, but I vasn't too crasy about da stuff da turkey ate."

                 Adapted from Red Stangland's Ole & Lena Joke Book III  available at Lena and Ole's Gifts in Woodville, Wisconsin.

    Comments (0) 9:14 pm |

    Lena & Ole Joke

    Lena has been delinquent — she hasn't been sharing the jokes as she should have been.  She's sorry and she will get better!

    This week's joke:  The Angel Gabriel came down to Ole & Lena (now in their middle years) and said they could each have one wish granted.  Lena wanted a new house & new furniture and "poof" — she had it!  Ole wanted a woman 30 years younger than himself & "poof" — he was 90 years old!!                   

             (thanks to a fellow Red Hatter from the Norske Hatitudes for a variation on this joke)

    Comments (0) 6:50 pm |

    Lena and Ole Joke #1

    Ole, who is quite elderly at this point in his life, is resting peacefully on the front porch of a nursing home in the country, when he sees a cloud of dust up the road. He watches a farmer approaching, with a wagon. "Good afternoon!" hollers out Ole. "Afternoon," says Sven. "Vhere you headed?" asks Ole. "Home to my farm." "Vhat do you have in da wagon?" Ole continued."Manure," said Sven. "Manure, eh? What do you do wit it?" "I spread it over my strawberries," Sven says matter-of-factly. "Vell," says Ole, "ya should come over here for lunch someday. Ve use whipped cream."

    Comments (0) 1:43 am |